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 Langage of faces

The other's face tells about the person. But there is several levels of face. :

.External face with its beauty and awfulness

Internal face which shows joy and sorrow...

To take time to discover another face, through look and silence, means taking time to discover, rediscover the person...


  Language of word :

Through words exchanged, by listening to another, it is possible to express our joy and sorrow, desire and sufferings. Word is the cement of love when it introduces truth and confidence. It is also a place of equilibrium. When, looking for truth, I share my difference I stand as a person in front of a person. The speaking subject is subject. Without words it becomes object. Silence, absence of talks, consuming time, run that limits our true encounters are often sources of crisis. Non spoken words are an opening to jail, painful and destructive rancour, crisis (see couples' crisis).

On the other hand transparency might be deluding or destructive (see other chapters).


Hand in hand, caress of the face of the other, tenderness of his presence, her smile, are steps to the discovery of the other as a person in their totality...

Time of tenderness is different than the drunkenness of the encounter. It's a time of taming and equilibrium. It is time of 'attention to the other, shared peace. Tenderness is a preparation and attention to the other in its difference. It is respect of what is escaping me and attracting me in the same time. Tenderness mixed with speech is a place of peace and respect.

  Language of bodies

It is drunkenness but also place for growth and attention. Comprehension and encounter brought to its summit. But it can also be a place of slavery and impulses.

Sexuality gets its breadth and its joy when dialogue is clear and source of a true encounter. But this encounter supposes respect of time, time of taming and active mutual attention....

It is normal that this quality of relation is not attained at the beginning. Without doubt it also needs fundamentally a reciprocal engagement, instituted or not.

To escape to the slavery of its impulses you have to be listening to the other before all and this listening needs decentering, loss of your own power which leaves place to the other as a person. Time, distance and expression of these different languages (words, look, tenderness) are at the service of another kind of encounter, nicer and bigger ...

(See also : sexuality)


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